Hi everyone! I hope you are having a lovely day, you are listening to Sarah O’Rourke, ‘Bipolar and Me’ we are on our 5th episode in the 2nd series ‘It is What it is!’.
Before I start, I would like to say a bit of a disclaimer I guess because we are talking about some content listeners / readers may find disturbing. Again I will explain this is because I may not always see comments in time…
There may be reference to you know some over 18 activity and mental health is a sensitive topic and we do approach the more difficult areas like suicide.
Please remember if you are experiencing an emergency to call for help on 999/911 depending on where you are in this crazy world!
I am no doctor nor am I a therapist I am expressing my views on things in general and I have bipolar basically.
I will aim to post my blog/pod/vid all …on the same day… you can like, comment, dare to share remember hit subscribe? Thank you to those that have already! I always appreciate feedback!
Let’s get into it…
Now that I feel freer having released so much harboured grief and over such a long time I am learning to accept the things I can’t change. More intrinsic factors that will say a lot about my character as a person that I know I can control.
I need to get on with my life now and show my children what life is all about, the good the bad and the ugly (depends what side of the bed I get out of).
They get to wake up every day to me not knowing what my own personality will be like imagine what it’s like for them. Exciting for me we can always ask them haha
Anyway, I have decided to have better reactions. I am going to be better at being active in my own reactions and taking some control and ownership over how I choose to deal with situations. This will be a great test for me given my emotional instability I can tell you but where there is will I believe there is a way. What I mean by that is we can’t control what happens to us can we? But I can control my reactions to situations.
As a direct result of all of this… I kept a diary… I have expressed my views freely without discrimination or prejudice. It really has helped me grow into my new skin … I have grown in confidence, and I had ambitions of being part of the entertainment industry, I wanted to do something in the community, and I am doing both of those at the same time…multi-tasking see…I honestly applied for a masters thinking I would not get on the course and I did so congratulations to me.
I want my own values reflected in my relationships with others, that being family friends a partner… and no tolerance for anything less.
I do actually take pride in my character because I know deep down, I am a good person… I have realised it took many years to get in that very dark place I have been, and it might take years to recover but I will do just that and RECOVER. Nothing is permanent, is it? Feelings are temporary…. Riding my wave.
I am finally learning to be patient with own grown arse self …I am embracing bipolar rather than fighting it. Which is serving me unbelievable well at the moment. I still have good and bad days but hey who doesn’t?
I am setting short term achievable goals… I write a to do list I can tick off who doesn’t love a tick hm mm job done fancy fancy…
I am getting excited about my future and glad I don’t feel vulnerable anymore about my bipolar and psychosis. I feel like speaking out about it is normalising it for me in a way and that’s how it should be or could be if that’s what you want some people like to be private I just found this has helped me massively.
We all could make a difference! I just need to identify where I can… my new strengths and build on old ones.
I can’t change what I have… I have BIPOLAR ‘it is what it is’ but I can control who I am…and I am not BIPOLAR in a nut shell I have BIPOLAR I am not bipolar (because I am Sarah actually) and that is what I lost sight of.
I can model what strong and determined looks like for my children… show them resilience and a desire to fight back in a world that might keep knocking you down but once you’re at the bottom the only way is ‘up’ you just have to ‘get up’…easier said than done. If I can do it, they can too! If they won’t I will show them again and again anything is possible.
I carried a guilt for having bipolar for a long time and then realised after giving the boys and my dad a quiz they really are not affected by it like I thought so I could move on from that.
All that being said a huge thank you for watching if you think you would like more content like this then hit that like button and subscribe have a truly wonderful day! Bye for now…
